Okay, so my post in the wee hours of the morning was really only part of what was on my mind. As a matter of respect for my son I needed to check-in with him before I finished my thought process.
I had to do this because at 12 years old he reads every word of my blog, provides me with feedback and takes an interest in what I’m doing. It would simply be remiss of me to not take the time to make sure that this subject matter was something he felt comfortable reading about.
With everything we have going on in our lives today from work to working out, chores to play, spending time with family and sharing moments with friends it is no wonder why we are all feeling so overwhelmed.
I love my body.
Why is that statement so hard for people to believe and why is it so hard for me to say? Okay I’ll be honest it is a work in progress for me and something I have to be mindful of every single day. Continue reading Body Beautiful
The telltale signs are now everywhere you look. Fast approaching is Valentine’s Day and all the eye can see is a myriad of chocolates, roses and stuffed animals.
In honor of this celebration of all things love related I thought I would bring up everyone’s favorite. The relationship we all have with our food.
It’s raw. It’s like a scab being picked at again and again until it bleeds and the area around it is pink and warm to the touch.
Today was a shit day. I am not going to lie to you or myself. Letting go of control during the recovery period is one of the single most difficult things I have ever had to do.
What motivates me?
In the last 11 days since my operation I have had plenty of time to think about this question. Times where I was struggling to sit up, where I was waking up in the middle of the night crying due to pain or where I was really questioning what I had signed up for by doing this.
There seems to be a misconception that if you’ve reached your goal be it in weight, relationship or any other life circumstance that the process somehow becomes easier, that the journey becomes less riddled with potholes or that the discussions within are no longer necessary.
For the last couple of days I couldn’t figure out why I was having such a rough time writing this post.
Yes the painkillers are somewhat to blame because when they kick in I’m no more a wordsmith than a nuclear scientist. Then it dawned on me. I was having a struggle writing from the heart because this has been personal for me.
I am going to grab one of my more lucid moments to check in with you all. It is now almost 56 hours post surgery. The pain is definitely more intense than I thought it would be and the inability to get around easily is frustrating at best.
The day is here. I’m unable to sleep right now. I’ve been trying but it seems that the butterflies in my stomach and the waves of nerves and excitement have different ideas.
Before I try to sleep again I wanted to put a few words out there into the cyber world as I know I might not be in any shape to do that for a day or so (I am stubborn that way so we’ll see). Continue reading Guns Blazing